We have all been there. That scary scenario of not knowing whether your interest in someone is reciprocated. You think they might be keen on you, but how can you be sure? What if they are just being polite? Are they really flirting with you? What if they reject you? How are you going to manage the awkwardness? What will you say to your mutual friends? Before you take the plunge, ask yourself these five questions.
1. How Resilient Are You?
Most people bounce right back when someone they are interested in says "No thanks". Although it can be embarrassing and a little bruising to the ego, many singles shrug their shoulders and carry on. However, only you really know how well you cope with rejection. Some singles find it very disheartening and become extremely upset.
Here is a recent posting on a forum from a rejected single: "Every time I get rejected by girls it causes massive depression related problems for me. For the next 3-14 days after a "No" I often miss work, drink too much, isolate myself, become less productive, and lose all my self confidence. I haven't completely given up on asking girls out, but these rock bottom times caused by rejections are really starting to take their toll."
If this is sounding like a familiar scenario to you, and you experience similar emotions when you are rejected, you should definitely consider InterestedIfYouAre.
2. Are You Being Realistic In Your Expectations?
When you are attracted to someone, do you quickly envisage your life together as a happy couple? Have you already flashed forward through the wedding to the happily ever afters? Before it has even begun? If you are inclined to doing this, that will make a rejection even harder to accept. You need to keep persevering and reminding yourself that rejection is just rejection. It is not a statement about your personality, worthiness, or sex appeal. It just means that the other person doesn't think you would make a great pair right now.
3. Do You Have The Ideal Approach?
Often a rejection is a direct response to the way in which the person has been asked out. A "Yes" will only happen if you have your technique down to a fine art. If you become too intense or too creepy when asking someone out, you really need to refine your approach. It will also boost your confidence and your results if you could know beforehand whether or not they are interested in you as a date. More advice on this handy hint to follow.
4. Is Your Intended Date Part Of Your Social Or Professional Life?
Are you going to continue to come across the person you like even if they say no to a date? The last thing you need is the unease of having to continue to work with someone who said no to a movie or cup of coffee. Or the knowing looks from mutual friends when they hear you got a knock back. Your work colleagues and friends may never look at you the same way again. Alternatively, it would be a shame to miss out on what could be the love of your life, just through the worry of being embarrassed.
It can often be easier and a lot less tricky in these circumstances to use an intermediary. This would be someone whom you can both trust and feel at ease discussing these issues with. Someone who has no personal agenda and who is able to keep a confidence.
5. Can "Interested If You Are" Help?
Absolutely yes! If you are looking for a confidential intermediary to eliminate the potential awkwardness of asking someone out on a date then look no further. "Interested if you are" will allow you to know exactly whether that special someone is interested in you. No more hazardous guessing!
Once you are registered we will search to see if there are already people interested in you. Additionally, the people you are attracted to will receive a personalized and friendly invitation to register, and to provide the names of the people they like. If your interest is reciprocated then we will help you connect in a pleasant manner. If there should be no match, then your preferences will be stored waiting for a match to happen.
"You are not judged by the number of times you fail, only by the number of times you succeed." Ulysses.
The great advantage of InterestedIfYouAre is that it does not matter how many times you do not match, because nobody will ever know. The most important point to remember is that you need only succeed once to totally change your love life!
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